remarkable communication

8 Ways to Use Numbers in Headlines

By Sonia Simone

I sympathize with blog readers who hate numbers in post titles. "10 Ways to X" is a classic headline formula, but it's being worked to death online.

Up to 86% of the time, it's a lazy way to drum up a post without putting too much thought into it.

64% of sophisticated blog readers believe that using a number in a post title is so pathetically obvious that it couldn't possibly still work.

I recently got a big rush of new readers from a post called 50 Things Your Customers Wish You Knew.

Now I didn't have a way to run a split test against a headline "Things Your Customers Wish You Knew" (wouldn't that be a cool WordPress plugin?), but a quick look through my stats shows that posts with numbers consistently bring in between 2.5-8 times more traffic (and more referrals from sites like Digg or Stumble) than posts without.

Numbers are a time-honored trigger to get us to pay attention. When you use a number in a headline, whether it's in a blog post, an email subject header, an ad or even in a face-to-face conversation*, you immediately hook the other person's interest.

Numbers reach directly into our unconscious and say, "this message is important."

(By the way, according to Jakob Nielson, numbers as figures work better on the Web than numbers as words.)

How to write a "numbers post" without being cheesy
First, tempting though it may be, don't put a number into every headline. (Unless you're using the convention of Stuff White People Like, which actually would work beautifully for a lot of serious topics.)

Second, realize that number posts are inherently likely to pull in more traffic--so capitalize on that. Make them meaty. Make them relevant. Put your best thinking and writing into them. These are the posts that will bring you new readers, so put your best foot forward.

It doesn't seem logical that a simple (and overused) trick could be so effective in conveying authority and reliability, but generations of advertising and headline writers can confirm that it works. So don't fall into the trap of avoiding number posts because they're overdone. Use them intelligently and on posts that deserve the extra attention numbers can bring.

* Of course face-to-face conversations can have headlines. In fact, I just bought a brilliant audio workshop on this very subject--more on that later.

(P.S. Did I make up all the boldface statistics in this post? Of course I did. But don't make up numbers in your own stuff--it makes the FTC cranky, and only Dilbert ever really gets away with it.)

(P.P.S. Yes, putting "8 Ways" in the title was a pathetically transparent attempt to get you to read this post. A little sad, isn't it?)

(P.P.P.S. Got a "numbers post" you're proud of? Post a link in the comments and we'll all come admire it.)

Related reading:

• How to Supercharge Your Content With Concrete Details

Flickr Creative Commons image by hownowdesign

Why Mom Was Right About Success

By Sonia Simone

Let's face it, moms know everything. (Of course, now that I have a child, I realize how pitifully incorrect this is. Never mind.) Mom had it right on the big stuff, anyway. And she had it right because she loved you, and love is smarter than anything.

So as a last-minute mother's day present, here are 6 (ok, 5) mom-approved tips for your own personal and professional success.

1. Just be yourself. If people don't like it, they aren't real friends anyway
There's no worse waste of time, energy and money than trying to do work for clients who aren't right for you. In the first place, it won't work--you'll go broke trying. And in the time you waste, you could have been connecting with dozens or hundreds or thousands of clients who would love and appreciate you.

Assuming you aren't a sociopath with halitosis, spend as little time as possible dwelling on what you do badly. Focus on being unbelievably great at what you do well.

Consider constructing a 12-foot tall neon sign about anything you're a little insecure about. Hot pink is a good color. (Mine reads: "World's Least Competent Cold Caller.") This will, perversely, read as confidence, and the people who already liked you will start to put much more trust in you.

2. If you can't say something nice . . .
I realize this somewhat contradicts #1, especially if you happen to be a snarky, edgy type of person who can hone an insult sharper than a San Quentin shiv.

Let's face it. There are few pleasures that compare to trash talking, especially if you're really good at it. That delectable shiver of superiority as your arrow hits the mark. The boom of approving laughter. Well-honed snark is a mighty, mighty drug.

There's almost nothing about my life I would change, except for the times I've hurt people with something I have said. Even if the person you're going after is Ted Bundy, you'll do some collateral damage. Some nice, interesting, quiet person (who might have had something really remarkable to contribute) will be angered and hurt by what you've said, and you'll never even notice.

The tricky part is, for some of us, this really is where our gifts lie. Some of us are Molly Ivins, or Bill Hicks. If that's you, be sure to choose your targets wisely. Go after Google, or China, or network television. Remember the traditional journalist's credo: afflict the comfortable and comfort the afflicted.

3. If you're that bored, go clean your room
Feeling stuck? Can't move forward? Spinning your wheels and making no progress?

I'll lay odds that somewhere, there's some uncomfortable business that you need to attend to, but you're putting it off. Maybe it's getting over your number-phobia and talking with a bookkeeper. Maybe it's coming to terms with your fear and loathing of marketing. Maybe it's just a half-day of errands, running around to get your PO Box and business checking set up.

The things you put off not only mutate to ten times their natural size, they also start creating weird unconscious blocks in other parts of your life. Somewhere, where you can't quite hear it, there's a tape (I suppose these days, this is now an MP3) running that's saying, "if I can't even get it together to set up an email newsletter, there's no way I can actually succeed at this business/project/fundraiser."

I don't know what "clean your room" will mean for you, but you do. It popped into your head about four seconds ago. Write it down, right now.

(Waiting for you to write it down.)

OK, now before you can think about it too much, just go get it done. If you can physically get off your ass right this minute and get it finished, do that. If not, scribble on a post-it the next thing you need to do to make this happen, and then figure out exactly when you're going to do that. Before the end of this week, please.

You'll be happily surprised by how much energy this frees up. That same MP3 player will start playing a new tune, something more like, "huh, I guess I'm kind of a stud after all. Now that I've got that done, I'm going to do this other thing right now."

Sounds hokey, but it works. Like so much of mom's advice.

4. Look with your eyes, not with your hands
OK, I wracked my brain and can't figure out a way to translate this one to success. It just cracks me up when I hear myself telling my own kid this. Sorry.

5. If your friends jumped off the Golden Gate Bridge, would you do it?
Never mind that the true answer to this is usually sure I would. Mom was trying to teach you that the right answer is no, and that's good advice.

What works beautifully for Skellie or Clay or Caroline may not be the right choice for me.

My version of a great Copyblogger post (I thought the naked one was pretty good) looks significantly different from Brian's great posts, or James's, or Dean's or Roberta's.

Being inquisitive and paying attention and learning by observation are all terrific. God knows I built this blog on the foundation of a pretty transparent role model. (I believe Brian's term for the early days of remarcom was "a shrine.") I can heartily endorse copying someone really good for a little while. But you do it to learn your own voice, your own obsessions, and your own unique contributions.

If you've ever bought something just because the ad or sales letter was irresistible, try to find that ad and copy it out by hand. Do that with any written ad that really pulls you. You'll learn a surprising amount.

Copy wisely, copy from the best, then set copying aside and do your own thing. You really can conquer the world that way.

6. Look where you're going
When all else fails, pay attention. The more lost you feel, the more curiosity you need to cultivate about where you are and what's going on right this instant.

There's a ton of advice out there about just about anything. Irritatingly, each of us has to build our own version of the map. We construct it with 10,000 jigsaw pieces in front of us, only 4,000 of which fit the puzzle we're working on. Horribly inefficient, but it's the only way to make something real.

Keep paying attention. The path will appear. Make sure your shoes are tied and you've got clean underwear, a kleenex and enough money to get a taxi home if you need to. You're going to do just fine.

(P.S. What's your own favorite bit of advice from mom? Let us know in the comments, please!)

Flickr Creative Commons image by basykes

How to Take a Punch (Without Hitting Back or Sinking to the Mat)

By Sonia Simone

Here's the part no one talks about, when you're creating content strategies for your business. You reveal a few personal details and make yourself vulnerable. You pour your heart into your content, because you know that in order to make a personal connection, people need to feel they know you. You work hard getting it as great as you possibly can.

And someone comes along who hates it, and you feel like you've been pissed on.

Now you may be one of those highly admirable people who takes nothing personally. If so, go check out something practical like Chris Garrett's post today, this one will bore you to death.

But if you're a thin-skinned sensitive soul like I am, you will feel like killing yourself. Jumping off a bridge seems like a pleasant proposition next to this. We quirky souls (I prefer quirky to neurotic, don't you?) secretly spend a little too much time mentally listing all the ways we aren't good enough, don't know enough, and are entirely unworthy of any success, love, fame or money. An unappreciative remark (or a downright criticism) hits us like a bucket of ice water to the face.

"Aha!" we think. "I knew I sucked. Now I have validation. Add to my to-do list, find bridge."

Since the world is a better place if you do not, in fact, kill yourself, here are a few strategies for when you're finding it just too awful to go on.

1. Keep a testimonial file
Ideally you'll do this before some brute rains on your parade. Create a file of great things people have said about you. Keep it where you can always find it. (The Web is nice for this--I'm never far away from my Backpack.) Unless you are Osama Bin Laden, your fans are going to massively outnumber your critics. Keep a lot of evidence from your fans, and make a point of referring to it frequently.

This is not vanity, this is a simple reality check. Most of us weigh criticism far more heavily than we do kudos, an unhelpful and unhealthy habit. We need to make a point of remembering to focus on the good stuff.

2. Resist the temptation to kick yourself for getting upset
You may have an internal monologue that goes something along the lines of, "Why am I such an idiot to take everything personally? I'll never be able to succeed if I don't get a thicker skin. God, if only I didn't suck I'd be making as much money as Brian/Darren/ at the very least Remarkablogger. Stupid, stupid, stupid idiot to take it personally. Stop taking it personally. God damn it, stop. Ugh. Moron."

Let me be gentle. This is not helping you, sweetie. You've just taken a right cross to the jaw--please try to refrain from giving yourself a left hook to follow it up.

When I catch myself doing this, I find it extremely helpful to wallow in my misery. Go ahead and feel bad about getting criticized. In fact, go ahead and feel awful. It's quite helpful to zero in on physical reactions--my scalp always gets hot when I feel under attack, and my gut gets cold and knotted up. Pay attention to all that. Let yourself feel absolutely dreadful. The more completely you can give in to it, the quicker it passes.

3. Control your outward reaction
Since I am good with words, at one point in my life I responded to criticism with the verbal equivalent of neutron bombs. I can be pretty darned mean when I set my mind to it.

Not smart. Or kind.

Liz Strauss had a nice point on this at SOBCon. If you get slammed, say thank you. As unappealing as this may seem (and believe me, I've tried to find a workaround, but so far, no luck), criticism can sometimes be very useful. When you've had a chance to process everything, you can go back and decide whether or not there's something to learn. In the meantime, you'll look cool, calm and collected.

Which, in my evolved way, I like to think of as nice revenge on the rat bastard.

If you're a true head case like I am, it's smart to work up your response in advance. Feel free to steal this one:

"Thanks so much for that, [jerkface]. I'm going to give that some more thought."

Expert communicator tip: This works better if you use their name rather than [jerkface].

4. Don't over-correct
You've put a lot of time and thought into your content. If one person in a hundred hates it, the odds are not in their favor.

So yes, you may learn something valuable. But don't change your direction until you've given yourself enough time to really process it. If you're still angry and hurt, you're not there yet. Once you can think about the comment and not get mad, you're ready to learn.

If you're still boiling, go back to step 2. Vent, vent, vent. Wallow in your rage and misery and be an absolute drama queen until it doesn't really bug you any more.

You may be strongly (and subconsciously) tempted to do anything at all to avoid ever getting criticized again. Resist this with everything you've got. Nothing is more boring than inoffensive content.

5. Congratulations! You're succeeding
This is the really annoying one. When you're getting criticized, it means you're moving toward success. Your stuff is getting in front of more eyes, which means your odds of finding a critic go up. And you look strong and confident enough that the people who dislike strong, confident people will take a potshot at you.

Also, your thin skin can actually be a tremendous asset. Great content and relationship marketing depend on a high level of empathy. Being a delicate flower usually means you're a blackbelt at empathy. If you can, think of your writhing agony as a price you pay for gifts that come in very handy at other times.

I know all of this is easier said than done. Believe me, I have 42 years of experience in how much harder it is to do than to say. But these do help me a lot, and I hope some of them may help you too. Most of you are far less mentally ill than I am, so you may not need all of them.

Related Reading:

• What to Do When the Conversation Gets Ugly

So let us know in the comments: What's your best technique is for handling criticism?

(p.s. If you like this post, I will be honored if you'd Digg, Stumble or link!)

Flickr Creative Commons image by ganessas

Monkeys and Bloggers and Tribes (oh, my!)

By Sonia Simone

Have the past couple of days been driving you nuts (here and on some other blogs you might be following)? All this inside baseball from SOBCon--lots of us Twittering like crazy, mostly for the benefit of the other 130-odd bloggers who were there.

The worst part is, most of us are so exhausted that our notes are terrible. "Brogan said we should care about people! OMG he is such a freaking genius. BRB, I have to go schmooze Brian Clark."

(Note: this is in no way to suggest that Brogan is not a genius.)

There were exceptions, but I'm afraid I wasn't one of them! I hope my fragments held some value for some of you, at least.

But I did pick up a lot of ideas to riff on, and the heart of SOBCon itself is one of them:

Community Is Fundamental
Community, along with ego and family and mortality, is one of those primal driving forces. If you want to tap into something deep and fundamental in order to deliver your message, community is one of the options.

When we were just starting out as upright monkeys, you kept your tribe solid or you all died. Finding stuff to eat was not so easy, and finding stuff that wanted to eat you was way too easy. We needed an intense bond that kept us connected, even when we wanted to kill each other. Connection was not optional. It's why we, as a species, are still here.

Creating a community around what you do is still a great way to survive in a hostile landscape. If your customers can form a tribe around your product or service (or church or nonprofit or whatever your particular gig might be), you win. Their loyalty to your tribe can become completely disproportional to the merits of what you have to offer. (cough Apple cough cough).

Tribes Aren't Indestructible
They can be wrecked by cluelessness, carelessness, shifting priorities. Back in the day, there was a rich collection of tribes on GE's online forum (GEnie). Gardeners, romance writers, gamers, Forth geeks--you name it, there was a GEnie RoundTable for it. Then one day, GE decided to sell its weirdo little project to a company that couldn't handle it. Chains were yanked, prices skyrocketed, and eventually GEnie was killed off by a failure to patch it up for Y2K. Bye-bye tribes.

Those of us who were there can tell you that the tribes didn't die because they weren't real. They died because tribes are fragile, and (assuming you're not an Inuit on an ice floe trying to survive the winter) we have other options.

Inside/Outside
As powerful as community can be, it hurts to be on the outside looking in. Inclusion feels safe and natural. We find our little monkey place in the community, and that feels right. Exclusion feels dangerous and wrong. There is no hatred like the hatred of the monkey who feels she's been shut out.

If you build a community for any reason, you owe it to them to figure out how you will keep the infrastucture going. And you owe it to yourself to figure out--early--who you'll bring in and who you will keep out. There are many excellent reasons to put up some boundaries (ever been in an AOL chat room?), but you also have to realize it's going to be acutely painful to someone.

While I've been monkeying around with my blogger pal tribe, I hope I haven't done so to the exclusion of the community that's grown up around this blog. I've just been on vacation one tribe over.

They're nice folks, thank you all for indulging my postcards. The weather was beautiful, wish you'd been there.

SOBCon Update: Saturday

By Sonia Simone

My head is so overstuffed with ideas that I couldn't possibly write them all down, but here are some selected scribbles from today's workshops. I've got notes for about five years of blog posts.

Brian Clark:

• A lot of the keys to good blogging are the keys to good business. What used to work won't be tolerated any more.
• Thinking of ourselves as entrepreneurs, not as bloggers.
• Your revenue model should be: "Yes, please."
• Attention by itself is not the game. It's a critical part of the game, but once you have attention, there is more work to be done.
• You have to know what you want to say, even if you end up hiring someone to help you say it.
• Build as much authority as you can on one "hub" domain, with satellite pages or additional sites around it for side projects, promotion, etc.

Chris Garrett:

• If you don't work out what you want to get out of it, you'll get the wrong things out of it.
• A really good question can be better than a really good statement.
• Create an editorial calendar for the blog. [I didn't get why this was cool until he showed us what that would look like. Figuring out how often to do linkbait, when & how guest posts fit in, etc.]
• Flagship content is an ambassador for what you do.

David Bullock: (supergenius who I didn't know before I came here):

• "I do blogging wrong.  I just do stuff that works for my business."
• No money will move before the conversation line is in place.
• What kind of systems do you have in place to pay attention & act on what you learn?
• How does your story match the story of the marketplace? If the conversations don't mesh, you get no action.
• The good stuff is you. Your uniqueness and your experience. Essentially, it's your thinking people will pay for--the doing can be outsourced, the thinking is yours alone.
• You will find the language of your market in the testimonials of your clients.
• The Internet is links and pages. That's all it is.

Chris Brogan:

• The big secret is that businesses are full of people.
• Build stories humans want to tell.
• Give your ideas handles.
• Make it useful.
• Hack--make things your own.
• Do more than you talk.

Liz Strauss:

• Come up with something they want (not something they need).
• Create your message with head, heart and meaning.
• Blog your experience.
• Leave room for your community. Don't wrap everything up so damned neatly.

Wendy Piersall:

• Everyone is doing business stuff and heart stuff at the same time.
• It's not pretty getting outside of your comfort zone.
• We need a BS filter for the stuff in our own head.
• Create micro "success for today" goals.
• There is no more time. Give me more you.

Oh, and a P.S., I met the brilliant Cliff Atkinson, who created Beyond Bullet Points. BBP is required reading not just for creating PowerPoint that isnt awful, but for sharpening and clarifying your thinking so you can create a message that actually conveys something. Very hard to do, but it's work that has a huge payoff.

SOBCon Update: Friday night

By Sonia Simone

OK, as promised, entirely unfiltered notes:

I wouldn't have thought Chris Garrett would be so darned sweet. Brogan, sure. But ChrisG--gigantic sweetheart.

There are women here! A lot of 'em! It warms my heart to see women at geeky conferences.

It's not your brand. When you put your brand out for social media to play with, it becomes their (our) brand, and you can't have it back again.

Best line of the night, bar none, by Christine Kane (who is awesome): Copyblogger would rename "Hey Jude" to "12 Irrefutable Reasons Jude Should Listen to Me."

The Digital Cultural Evangelist for Edelman was there. I wanted to talk with her, then got sidetracked. Damn.

When most people figure out that the great New Social Media is just conversations & relationships, those of us who get a little mileage out of being Those Who Get It are sort of screwed. But we keep putting it out there, keep evangelizing, even though we're sowing the seeds of our own irrelevance.

More Christine Kane: "A great dream, and a history of playing small . . . Right out of nowhere, you open your heart and that changes everything."

Remarkable Communication Lands in Chicago

By Sonia Simone

Landed in Chicago after one of those flights with endless time sitting on the runway without information, snacks, or air conditioning (blog post fodder), reading Fast Company four times through for lack of something better to do (more blog fodder, very cool article about geek TV), then watching documentaries on the airplane about Hitler (still more blog fodder that will probably never get posted) and Bob Dylan (trying to figure out if that one's more a Copyblogger or Remarkable Comm post).

And Twitter is down, of course, so I can't wave hello the way I usually would.

So I'll wave hello from here to my lovely blog friends, many of whom I'll meet shortly at SOBCon. My plan is to take lots of notes and post about the stuff I think you guys would find most interesting. I managed to get three fountain pens here with no ink disasters, so I am ready to be a note-taking maniac. This SOBCon is all about business uses of social media, so I plan to fly out of Chicago ready to give Darren Rowse a run for his money.

This plan may get entirely wrecked by staying out too late trying to get Brian Clark to say something indiscreet by pouring tequila into him, but we'll just have to see. (If only Naomi was here.) If nothing else, I'll have 50 pages of notes to use for blog riffs for the next 6 months.

So if you're not a fan of messy, possibly rant-y, unpolished posts, you may want to avert your eyes for a couple of days. I'll be back home next week. Note to potential burglars: my husband is still home and he's much, much meaner than I am.

What Romance Novels Can Teach You About Copywriting

By Sonia Simone

The latest Copyblogger post! It's been getting some very nice comments, which always makes me feel warm & fuzzy.

http://www.copyblogger.com/romance-novels/

The Hidden Cost of Playing It Safe

By Sonia Simone

A lot of us put significant energy into keeping it safe. We don't want to do anything that wouldn't be tasteful. We don't want to do anything that would get on anyone's nerves. And we truly, madly, deeply don't want to make any mistakes. If we get a complaint or some crabby feedback, we scurry back and "fix" what we did so it won't upset anyone.

We guard carefully against "losing" any readers or customers. (When we should be putting more energy into truly winning some.) We play by the rules. We take pains never to offend anyone, and we believe fervently that that keeps us safe.

We are dead wrong.

Boring is dangerous
The problem with boring is, you don't see the damage it causes. It's easy to miss the huge majority who yawn and click the Stumble button again. You never see the customers who don't come back because they don't ever think about you. You have no idea of the business you're missing out on because your communication is just too nice and normal for anyone to remember or talk about.

It's easy to tell yourself that the problem is the short attention spans that are rampant today, or the monumental failure of the public taste, or that there's too much competition. Those may all be true, but that doesn't get you any business. It's painfully easy to blame your lack of success on what's wrong with everyone else.

Being boring doesn't keep you safe. Maybe it used to, for a little while, but it doesn't any more. If you want to really terrify yourself, pick up a book called Funky Business. The authors are Swedish economics professors, and come across a tiny bit like Saturday Night Live characters ("Ja, we go to discos. Also we wear black.") but they've got a razor-sharp analysis of the new economic primordial soup we're all swimming around in.

I try not to swear on the blog, so I can't tell you the Funky Business take on what the 21st-century economy boils down to, but I can tell you: it's not playing it safe.

Remember when you were in second grade and there was that fearless, fast kid who used to swoop in and steal your Snickers before you really understood what was happening? That kid is still around, and he's launching a lean, aggressive, competitive little business that's about to do it again.

Being an idiot is not the answer
Being a damned fool works for some people, but I'll tell you, it's got to be genuine. I doubt the damned fool strategy will work for you, for one reason: damned fools don't read my blog. Despite my best efforts, I use too many big words and I keep picking weird pictures.

So most of you reading this are, well, smarter than the general population. Which can be something of a handicap, quite frankly. Let me guess, history majors, lit majors, maybe the occasional dual-major in Russian and math? (Tell us in the comments!) And, of course, the usual collection of self-taught misfits who write essays (which you might call blog posts) for fun on the influences of Proust in Ren & Stimpy. You're a bunch of smartypants, which is why you come here for advice.

So if Jon Morrow was right in his terrific recent post, and valedictorians make lousy bloggers (and/or marketers), what are we supposed to do about that?

Here's Jon's answer, which I like a lot.

Unlike high school, being a blogosphere “clown” is less about acting stupid and more about telling the truth in an interesting way. Sometimes they’ll laugh, sometimes they’ll get mad, and sometimes they’ll be thinking about your post two weeks later. Regardless, as long as you’ve captured and maintained their attention, you’ve won.

Your to-do list

• Know what you know, then hold your ground. Don't water your stuff down because someone got pissy about it. If you're pissing some people off, you're on to something.
• Keep looking for interesting angles. Look for striking metaphors, startling examples, powerful stories.
• Come up with some rituals to celebrate failure. There is no way to succeed except through good old embarrassing, stinky failure. I've just discovered Molly Gordon, and she has a great technique in her eBook Principles of Authentic Promotion called the "Failure Bow." The eBook is free when you subscribe to her weekly e-newsletter (the opt-in form is on the right side of the page).
• Do at least one thing you think is a little tacky, just because you secretly love it.
• Consider writing a journal every day, especially some freewriting where you keep your pen (or keyboard) moving for 20 minutes without letting yourself stop. Let the words sit a week or two, then go back through your journals and look for stuff that freaks you out a little. There's something there you should be mining.

Related reading

• Is Your Good Taste Costing You Customers?

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Flickr Creative Commons image by exfordy

How to Build Stronger Customer Relationships

By Sonia Simone

For those who don't read Copyblogger, I have another post there this week on using conversation to create more remarkable connections with customers. Come by and say hi!